“In all the world, there is no heart for me like yours. In all the world, there is no love for you like mine.”
— Maya Angelou
INFJ personality types are fairly rational idealists, except when it comes to love. We experience intense feelings and in no other situation do we feel those feelings deeper than when it comes to romantic relationships. Not all INFJs believe that there is only one person out there for them. But many still have high expectations and look for someone who is their perfect match. We think of this person as the INFJ soulmate.
Most other personality types aren’t as idealistic as INFJs when it comes to love. For many INFJs, this can be hard to accept. According to David Keirsey in Please Understand Me II: Temperament, Character, Intelligence:
“Finding the rare person with whom they can share their inner world is difficult for Idealists, a painful process of trial and error, and often they vow not to date at all for periods of time rather than go through the search… However, once the special person comes their way (the man or woman of their dreams), they can be carried away with their feelings, and give almost all their attention to pursuing the relationship.”
Searching for the INFJ Soulmate
The search for the INFJ soulmate is something that makes INFJs despise typical dating routines, which feel forced and awkward. INFJs are not the type that likes to date for fun. INFJs prefer to form relationships out of deep friendship instead.
Once INFJs do find “the one”, they can make extremely caring and loyal partners, often putting their partner first and making the relationship a top priority. INFJ personality types love to learn about their partner and use what they’ve learned to improve the relationship. INFJs are best matched with someone who shares this desire. Otherwise, they’re likely to feel like they are not being appreciated or valued.
As an INFJ personality type, what’s your experience with dating and relationships?