Are INFJs and ENxPs the Perfect Match?

When it comes to romantic relationships, it’s hard to define what attracts us to a person. As an INFJ personality type, it can be especially hard to find someone who we feel a natural connection with. However, INFJs and ENxPs (ENTPs and ENFPs), are often referred to as a “perfect match.”

Are INFJs and ENxPs really the perfect match? And if so, what is it about ENFPs and ENTPs that INFJs find so appealing?

Why INFJs Like ENTPs and ENFPs

There are many theories on why INFJs and ENxPs get along so well. Below are a few of the most popular.

1. INFJs and ENxPs live in world of ideas and meaning.

According to The Personality Page, ENTPs and ENFPs are the INFJ’s natural partner because the ENxP dominant function, Extroverted Intuition, is the best match for the INFJ dominant function, Introverted Intuition.

Basically, ENxPs process ideas, connections, and possibilities in the outside world. Whereas INFJs process concepts, perspectives, and meanings internally.

Essentially, these types see the world from two sides of the same coin.

2. INFJs and ENxPs understand each other.

Many types who have a dominant intuitive function express frustration about feeling misunderstood.

So it’s refreshing to find someone who not only is interested in the same ideas and conversations as we are, but who can help us understand them from a different processing style.

In The Science of Love, Chris Race expands on this topic when discussing relationships between INFJs and ENTPs:

“The ENTP and INFJ were meant to be together because the ENTP shares his intuition all the time.

Most people do not like to hear intuitions and theory they don’t understand in conversations.

The INFJ has the same skill at idea generation that the ENTP has. When the ENTP talks, the INFJ can listen and understand his very advanced intuitions.

INFJ’s and ENTP’s both like systems. The INFJ finds people systems more interesting; the ENTP systems of things.

When they communicate something special happens. The ENTP talks and the INFJ comprehends and listens automatically.

That means the ENTP feels listened to and completely understood.”

Of course, INFJ can also feel understood by other personality types, like INFPs, INTJs, and other INFJs.

But there is something else about ENTPs and ENFPs that causes INFJs to be extremely attracted to these types…

3. ENxPs extrovert what INFJs introvert.

What that means is that what ENxP types show the outside world is what INFJs keep hidden inside.

Even if we barely know the person, we’re attracted to their ability to display something that we can relate to, but often find a hard time putting into words.

To get a better understanding of this, let’s look at the cognitive functions of each type:

• INFJ: Introverted Intuition (Ni), Extraverted Feeling (Fe), Introverted Thinking (Ti), Extraverted Sensing (Se)
• ENTP: Extraverted Intuition (Ne), Introverted Thinking (Ti), Extraverted Feeling (Fe), Introverted Sensing (Si)
• ENFP: Extraverted Intuition (Ne), Introverted Feeling (Fi), Extraverted Thinking (Te), Introverted Sensing (Si)

ENTPs use the same two judging functions as the INFJ, Fe and Ti. However, they have opposite perceiving functions, Ne and Si.

ENFPs have dominant intuition, with auxiliary feeling, tertiary thinking, and inferior sensing — just like INFJs. BUT their functions are opposite on the extravert-introvert spectrum.

INFJs are drawn to both of these types for these reasons.

ENTPs are often considered better long-term partners for INFJs because the shared Fe and Ti functions help each type understand each others decision-making process.

However, ENFPs are extremely attractive to INFJs because they are on one hand so different, but yet the same. We may feel like they “complete us.”

Challenges of INFJ and ENxP Relationships

There are several benefits to being an INFJ in a relationship with an ENxP. However, like any relationship, there are going to occasionally be difficulties.

Here are some challenges that may come up in this relationship.

1. The extrovert-introvert challenge.

Some INFJs are more introverted than others and may feel more comfortable with a partner who is also an introvert.

ENxPs tend to be enthusiastic and often on the move. These types are happiest when they’re interacting with others, brainstorming new ideas, and discovering new possibilities.

While this is an attractive quality, it can also be draining for introverts, who need plenty of time to explore their inner world.

2. ENxPs are perceivers.

While the ENxPs spontaneity is attractive to INFJs, over time the Judging-Perceiving differences can cause conflict in the relationship.

The INFJ will feel overwhelmed always being the one who has to take charge when it comes to making plans, and the ENxP may view the INFJ as bossy.

However, J and P relationships can work great when both types are willing to understand and work with each other despite their differences.

Read More: How Js and Ps can Live in Harmony.

3. ENFPs can have a hard time understanding INFJs feelings, and vice versa.

ENFPs use Introverted Feeling and any relationship between an Introverted Feeler and an Extraverted Feeler is going to come with some misunderstandings.

INFJs prefer to process their feelings verbally, while ENFPs prefer to process internally.

INFJs may think the ENFP is being selfish after making a Fi-based decision because it might not take into consideration the feelings of others (Fe).

4. ENTPs and INFJs can also misunderstand each other’s feelings.

Even though ENTPs also use Extraverted Feeling, they’re still NT types who make decisions mainly through logical thinking, not emotions.

As stated on 16 Personalities:

“While ENTPs are more open-minded than other Analysts (NT) about others’ perspectives, they are also more likely to express their disdain for such things as emotional sensitivity in cuttingly well-phrased and clear terms, easily hurting their partners’ feelings without realizing it.

ENTP personalities may even ignore their partners’ feelings altogether, instead immersing themselves entirely in some distant idea or opportunity.”

While these are all things to look out for in INFJ and ENxP relationships, they aren’t anything that can’t be worked through. Success requires that each partner put in effort to understand the other and compromise.

The emotional maturity of each partner is extremely important to the relationship’s success.

An INFJ pursuing an emotionally immature ENxP, or one simply not ready for a serious relationship, will find themselves exhausted and hurt by the ENxPs carefree attitude.

Are INFJs and ENxPs the “Perfect Match”?

INFJs can be in successful relationships with any personality type.

I chose to write about the pros and cons with ENxPs because they are most commonly mentioned as the INFJs “ideal” type and I’ve received several messages from INFJs asking about relationships with ENTPs and ENFPs.

If you’re still looking for your perfect partner as an INFJ, don’t limit yourself to only a few personality types.

You don’t want to miss out on finding your soulmate just because their function stack isn’t perfectly “complementary” with yours.

I personally think that both partners being aware of MBTI® and understanding how the functions work is important in creating a better understanding of each other and ultimately maintaining a happy relationship.